Songs that bear no relationship to reality (10 Viewers)

[Covkid1968#]

....songs where you have to suspend all reality and even when singing them you just cant but help feeling that something doesn't quite stack up.....Sky Blue song apart...

"We are the famous the famous sky blues....why are we famous....cus we never lose"

"...........McSheffrey...he comes form Coventry.....he's better than Rooney"

It used to make me chuckle listening to Leicester singing how Leicester were "by far the greatest team the world has ever seen"......

Maybe I'm just getting old and thinking things through to much....but I say lets have some new songs based on reality......Any ideas???

I was thinking along the lines of .......
.
Eeeii Eeeii Eeeiiioooo
Up the football league we go,
When we finish 9th,
This is what we'll sing,
We are City,
We are City,
Robbins done ok

 

---

[superskyblue]

Most deluded is 'We've got Michael Doyle... He never gives the ball away'

 

[Sky Blue Harry H]

We're gonna win 6-5, when we're 5-0 down (anybody that is, not just us - although the gallows humour song always makes me smile at fans resilience)

 

[Sky Blue Harry H]

Jack Grimmer whooaaooh
Jack Grimmer wgooaaooh
He's young and blond and fit
I'm turning gay (a bit)

(I'll get me coat !)

 

[ccfcway]

i'm a firestarter, twisted firestarter.


I'm not at all. I just put the central heating on...

 

[Sky Blue Harry H]

To 'my old man's a dustman'

Grendel hates Biamou
He don't like Ryan Haynes
And even when they're playing well
Then Grendel still complains

 

[Kingokings204]

Is it in a coventry house or home?

I still don’t know after 15 years

 

[Sky Blue Harry H]

Is it in a coventry house or home?

I still don’t know after 15 years

Is what in a Coventry house / home(? Did you leave something there 15 years ago?

P.S. The song is 'in our Coventry house' (if sung incorrectly !!!!)

 

[Mild-Mannered Janitor]

Who needs Cantona when we’ve got Wegerle

 

[Mild-Mannered Janitor]

Take me home, Highfield road.......unless you’re buying a 2 bed terrace or flat

 

[rob9872]

I finally have to admit that we're not the greatest team the world has ever seen

 

[cov4theprem]

'While we sing together, we will never lose'

I think I have a pie chart of the reality...

 

[JimmyHillsbeard]

Virtually all of our songs are inaccurate and some are embarrassing but it’s hardly new.

We nicked “In our Coventry homes” from the Scousers but omitted the only fkin line that’s more appropriate for Coventry than Liverpool “we meet under a statue exceedingly bare”.

But that’s nothing compared to the cringefest that was “What’s that coming over the hill, is it a Mifsud?”

 

[Adge]

“The famous Coventry City went to Rome to see the Pope”
Did they? Must of missed that one.:emoji_thinking:

 

[Alkhen]

"Tottenham or Chelsea, United or anyone, They shan't defeat us, We'll fight 'till the game is won"

Even if we reverted to the old Proud,Posh or Cobblers version it'd still be stretching the limits of believability

 

[shmmeee]

My City does not make me happy when skies are grey, statistically they’re far more likely to make me miserable when skies are blue.

As for realistic chants:

“You are my City, my only City
so I am stuck here
Watching this shite
We might do OK
Until Christmas
Then get sucked into
a relegation fight. “

 

[singers_pore]

Funniest song heard recently:

His tits are offside
His tits are offside
Oh Akinfemwa
His tits are offside

 

[Otis]

'You're going home in an ambulance!'

'You're going home in a taxi.'

Merely suggestions surely, with no prior knowledge or insight into the actual situation of the transportation of choice.


'We all agree Coventry City are magic!'

I've seen some deft touches from the likes of Nuddy and Hutch and Ernie Hunt etc.in my time, but these can all be explained with pure logic I would have thought and no actual supernatural effort has been involved.

 

[Johhny Blue]

When Derby only brought a handful "We'll see you both outside"

 

[Johhny Blue]

We had true songs as well
"We've got Hutch on the wing and Stein in the middle"

 

[Otis]

And the Greggy Downs song.

He really didn't have any hair and most of us really weren't that bothered that he didn't.

 

[Otis]

Another incorrect one was....

'6'ft 2, eyes of blue
Big Jim Holton's after you
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la.'

He wasn't really after you. Not unless you were at school and the teacher was reading out the register and you were any name up to Big Jim Holdon.

In that scenario he would have of course actually been after you.

 

[Terry_dactyl]

Another incorrect one was....

'6'ft 2, eyes of blue
Big Jim Holton's after you
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la.'

He wasn't really after you. Not unless you were at school and the teacher was reading out the register and you were any name up to Big Jim Holdon.

In that scenario he would have of course actually been after you.

How do you know he wasn’t after you?

 

[Otis]

How do you know he wasn’t after you?

I wasn't his type.

I bathed, I sprayed pheromones, wore seductive clothing and absolutely nothing, no interest whatsoever from him.

 

[Johhny Blue]

I wasn't his type.

I bathed, I sprayed pheromones, wore seductive clothing and absolutely nothing, no interest whatsoever from him.

You sound like my type!

 

[Terry_dactyl]

I wasn't his type.

I bathed, I sprayed pheromones, wore seductive clothing and absolutely nothing, no interest whatsoever from him.

...He wouldn’t return my calls, respond to my letters, would drive/run off when he saw me in the street/at the training ground/at his home, he’d call the police when he’d find me hiding in his garden/his garage/his bedroom, and take out those injunctions against me, he paid that hit man to kill me, he would transfer to that team in America...
I really hate it when sports stars lose touch with reality and haven’t got time for us fans!

 

[Otis]

...He wouldn’t return my calls, respond to my letters, would drive/run off when he saw me in the street/at the training ground/at his home, he’d call the police when he’d find me hiding in his garden/his garage/his bedroom, and take out those injunctions against me, he paid that hit man to kill me, he would transfer to that team in America...
I really hate it when sports stars lose touch with reality and haven’t got time for us fans!

Yup. Even when I told him my nickname was Legs Akimbo he barely batted an eyelid.

 

[Ricketts]

Jack Grimmer whooaaooh
Jack Grimmer wgooaaooh
He's young and blond and fit
I'm turning gay (a bit)

(I'll get me coat !)

Great thread this, but that one seems to have been worked on for some time, Harry!

 

[Covstu]

Is it in a coventry house or home?

I still don’t know after 15 years

Student accommodation now....:cigar:

 

[Adge]

Oh I do like to be beside the seaside, oh I do like to be beside the sea, oh I do like to stroll along the Prom Prom Prom, where the brass band plays "F*#k off West Bromwich and Birmingham"
Must say I didn't hear or see them playing it at Brighton a couple of weeks ago whole walking along the Pier etc.

 

[ovduk78]

Another incorrect one was....

'6'ft 2, eyes of blue
Big Jim Holton's after you
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la.'

He wasn't really after you. Not unless you were at school and the teacher was reading out the register and you were any name up to Big Jim Holdon.

In that scenario he would have of course actually been after you.

....and not ignoring the fact that he was only 6ft 1!!!!

 

[Otis]

....and not ignoring the fact that he was only 6ft 1!!!!

Yeah, that then would have only worked if he had very poor eyesight and his dad was called Ronald.

'6ft 1, dad's called Ron,
Big Jim Holton's eyes have gone,
La, la, la, la, la la, la, la.'

 

[stevefloyd]

My old mans a dustman...... he aint he's retired and was never a dustman

 

[ovduk78]

My favourite song is one that was sung by West Brom whenever they played in London

I wish I was in London, I do, I do
I'd go down to Trafalgar Square & say to old Lord Nelson
"Fuck off, Fuck off you one eyed cockney wanker!!"

I worked with a lad from Norfolk for about a year and I regularly used to sing it and he would get wound up and would keep reminding me that Nelson was actually from Norfolk

 

[Sky Blue Harry H]

When Derby only brought a handful "We'll see you both outside"

alongside 'Come in a taxi, you could have come in a taxi'