How are you feeling? (7 Viewers)

Greggs · Sep 20, 2023

Thought i'd open a thread where people can express how they're feeling.
I openly admit I used this place as a dumping ground, and had been in a dogshit mood and a dark place for a few weeks. Feeling so much better now after a break from work and away from my phone. Diet has improved, no beers, exercising hard and feeling good about myself.
A few of you reached out (you know who you are) and it helped massively. Thank you
Feel free to vent on this thread, don't hold back and use it as a place to express and talk.
Cheers

Ccfcisparks · Sep 20, 2023

Greggs said:
Thought i'd open a thread where people can express how they're feeling.
I openly admit I used this place as a dumping ground, and had been in a dogshit mood and a dark place for a few weeks. Feeling so much better now after a break from work and away from my phone. Diet has improved, no beers, exercising hard and feeling good about myself.
A few of you reached out (you know who you are) and it helped massively. Thank you
Feel free to vent on this thread, don't hold back and use it as a place to express and talk.
Cheers

The lack of donkey GIFs in circulation on this site tells me you are feeling better.

Glad to hear it mate.

Otis · Sep 20, 2023

I bet if you fitted air conditioning for a living, you would soon get bored of the "feel free to vent" quips.

I was in a bit of a dark place, but things are looking up nowish. Hoping to move within the next 3 weeks or so and I think I will be so much happier when I get there. Love being close to water, so we will only be 10 mins walk from the coast.

Maidstone is indeed a very dark place, so not the best place to be feeling down in the dumps for sure.

Brighton Sky Blue · Sep 20, 2023

Been in a bad place since around the first COVID lockdown and don't think I've properly recovered since. Just about to start back up again in research but it has been quite some time since I was last in it and having met my new colleagues I already feel a big sense of impostor syndrome.

Got diagnosed with depression earlier in the year and I refused medicine so trying CBT which is mixed. Trying to lose about 9.5 stone and have lost just over a stone in the past 6 weeks which is nice and giving me something to keep working towards. Never known a time where I wasn't overweight or obese so a large part of it for me is thinking it's not impossible.

Trying to take it a day at a time really.

Otis · Sep 20, 2023

Brighton Sky Blue said:
Been in a bad place since around the first COVID lockdown and don't think I've properly recovered since. Just about to start back up again in research but it has been quite some time since I was last in it and having met my new colleagues I already feel a big sense of impostor syndrome.

Got diagnosed with depression earlier in the year and I refused medicine so trying CBT which is mixed. Trying to lose about 9.5 stone and have lost just over a stone in the past 6 weeks which is nice and giving me something to keep working towards. Never known a time where I wasn't overweight or obese so a large part of it for me is thinking it's not impossible.

Trying to take it a day at a time really.

Good luck, BSB.

JAM See · Sep 20, 2023

How queer that you've started this thread on 20th September 2023.

My mum would have been 80 today and I've been thinking of her all day, and somewhat maudlin.

Died age 50.

I've had a good cry, and now weirdly, having typed the above, have the lyrics to three lions in my head.

Cheers @Greggs you've managed to put a smile on my face.

Grendel · Sep 20, 2023

I’m currently living the dream as a couple of people on here know.

Greggs · Sep 20, 2023

Otis said:
I bet if you fitted air conditioning for a living, you would soon get bored of the "feel free to vent" quips.

I was in a bit of a dark place, but things are looking up nowish. Hoping to move within the next 3 weeks or so and I think I will be so much happier when I get there. Love being close to water, so we will only be 10 mins walk from the coast.

Maidstone is indeed a very dark place, so not the best place to be feeling down in the dumps for sure.

sounds like the move can't come soon enough, i hope your next place turns puit to be your happy place mate!

Greggs · Sep 20, 2023

Brighton Sky Blue said:
Been in a bad place since around the first COVID lockdown and don't think I've properly recovered since. Just about to start back up again in research but it has been quite some time since I was last in it and having met my new colleagues I already feel a big sense of impostor syndrome.

Got diagnosed with depression earlier in the year and I refused medicine so trying CBT which is mixed. Trying to lose about 9.5 stone and have lost just over a stone in the past 6 weeks which is nice and giving me something to keep working towards. Never known a time where I wasn't overweight or obese so a large part of it for me is thinking it's not impossible.

Trying to take it a day at a time really.

Must be hard joining a new workforce when you're not feeling at your best One step at a time, if you need any jokes to tell them - give me a shout

ajsccfc · Sep 20, 2023

Was diagnosed with whatever the early warning stage of high blood pressure is so to avoid medication it's given me the kick to actually pay attention to diet and whatnot like I used to, so I'm slowly losing the weight and getting all sexy and that again. Bad point is I'm going to have to buy a load of new jeans a size down now

Also have all but stopped drinking entirely without realising and can't say I miss it. I plan to never have a hangover again

Grendel · Sep 20, 2023

Brighton Sky Blue said:
Been in a bad place since around the first COVID lockdown and don't think I've properly recovered since. Just about to start back up again in research but it has been quite some time since I was last in it and having met my new colleagues I already feel a big sense of impostor syndrome.

Got diagnosed with depression earlier in the year and I refused medicine so trying CBT which is mixed. Trying to lose about 9.5 stone and have lost just over a stone in the past 6 weeks which is nice and giving me something to keep working towards. Never known a time where I wasn't overweight or obese so a large part of it for me is thinking it's not impossible.

Trying to take it a day at a time really.

I actually lost 2 stone in a month when I gave drink up

I am addicted to therapy - or more likely my therapist - it’s pure self indulgence and I love talking about myself

hamertime · Sep 20, 2023

Horny

Brighton Sky Blue · Sep 20, 2023

Grendel said:
I actually lost 2 stone in a month when I gave drink up

I am addicted to therapy - or more likely my therapist - it’s pure self indulgence and I love talking about myself

I drink very rarely but for most of the past 20-25 years I've indulged in fizzy drinks and junk food. Used to play hockey and football which meant my weight didn't go up as quickly, then once I stopped it accelerated to the point of me being 21-22 stone.

Greggs said:
Must be hard joining a new workforce when you're not feeling at your best One step at a time, if you need any jokes to tell them - give me a shout

The vibe is certainly that they're not expecting much from someone who's been a teacher for most of the last decade. A bit like signing DaCosta but letting him loose in a lab.

Otis · Sep 20, 2023

Grendel said:
I’m currently living the dream as a couple of people on here know.

You're dating Fish?

CCFCSteve · Sep 20, 2023

Brighton Sky Blue said:
Been in a bad place since around the first COVID lockdown and don't think I've properly recovered since. Just about to start back up again in research but it has been quite some time since I was last in it and having met my new colleagues I already feel a big sense of impostor syndrome.

Got diagnosed with depression earlier in the year and I refused medicine so trying CBT which is mixed. Trying to lose about 9.5 stone and have lost just over a stone in the past 6 weeks which is nice and giving me something to keep working towards. Never known a time where I wasn't overweight or obese so a large part of it for me is thinking it's not impossible.

Trying to take it a day at a time really.

Youre already proving it to yourself by losing a stone in 6 weeks. That’s an amazing effort Keep it up !

I can’t keep banging on about the importance of exercise enough etc both for health and for mental well-being (release of endorphins, feeling better about yourself etc). I’m not fitness mad by any stretch but I reckon over the years just doing exercise 2-3 times a week has kept me sane through divorce, work, personal issues etc. Whether that’s the gym or brisk walk/jog whatever people can squeeze into their daily routines

Also, for anyone who’s having a tough time, there is always help out there. Reach out and ask for it. Don’t suffer in silence

Brighton Sky Blue · Sep 20, 2023

CCFCSteve said:
Youre already proving it to yourself by losing a stone in 6 weeks. That’s an amazing effort Keep it up !

I can’t keep banging on about the importance of exercise enough etc both for health and for mental well-being (release of endorphins, feeling better about yourself etc). I’m not fitness mad by any stretch but I reckon over the years just doing exercise 2-3 times a week has kept me sane through divorce, work, personal issues etc. Whether that’s the gym or brisk walk/jog whatever people can squeeze into their daily routines

Also, for anyone who’s having a tough time, there is always help out there. Reach out and ask for it. Don’t suffer in silence

Didn’t know you were divorced. I’m just not fit enough to play football for more than a few minutes so I use our exercise bike a few times a week and count calories for what we eat.

SkyBlueSoul · Sep 20, 2023

I feel like I'm in a bit of a rut atm due to a few factors all feeding into each other which is gradually getting to me more and more. Nothing insurmountable but it all adds up.

Moved into my own place in May which was a great decision, absolutely love having my own space but it's not without problems. No longer splitting rent/bills means I'm paying £500/month more than I was so money is a lot tighter now. Added to the fact work has been very quiet recently and I work from home so find myself sitting around my flat for whole days at a time. I've been single for a couple of years too which has been great, allowed me to be selfish and do whatever I want, but it's getting a bit boring/lonely now.

Normally I run/walk and play football (my only guaranteed social activity each week) to clear my head and have a laugh but I've got a dodgy heel/ankle atm so can't, even walking 10 minutes to the shops is painful.

Greggs · Sep 20, 2023

SkyBlueSoul said:
I feel like I'm in a bit of a rut atm due to a few factors all feeding into each other which is gradually getting to me more and more. Nothing insurmountable but it all adds up.

Moved into my own place in May which was a great decision, absolutely love having my own space but it's not without problems. No longer splitting rent/bills means I'm paying £500/month more than I was so money is a lot tighter now. Added to the fact work has been very quiet recently and I work from home so find myself sitting around my flat for whole days at a time. I've been single for a couple of years too which has been great, allowed me to be selfish and do whatever I want, but it's getting a bit boring/lonely now.

Normally I run/walk and play football (my only guaranteed social activity each week) to clear my head and have a laugh but I've got a dodgy heel/ankle atm so can't, even walking 10 minutes to the shops is painful.

What's up with the ankle mate? Is it a long term thing?

Grendel · Sep 20, 2023

Brighton Sky Blue said:
Didn’t know you were divorced. I’m just not fit enough to play football for more than a few minutes so I use our exercise bike a few times a week and count calories for what we eat.

It’s odd as about the only substance I’ve never had an addiction to is food

I can eat loads if I want but can easily manage on 1000 calories of food a day for a fair few days and can sometimes not bother to eat at all during the day

SkyBlueSoul · Sep 20, 2023

Greggs said:
What's up with the ankle mate? Is it a long term thing?

Not sure atm because in another unlucky twist I got a letter from my GP saying I'm outside their catchment area now I've moved around the time I started feeling it. Need to get my shit together and register at a new one to get it looked at, been a couple of weeks now.

Internet self-diagnosis tells me it's achilles tendonitis.

Flying Fokker · Sep 20, 2023

SkyBlueSoul said:
I feel like I'm in a bit of a rut atm due to a few factors all feeding into each other which is gradually getting to me more and more. Nothing insurmountable but it all adds up.

Moved into my own place in May which was a great decision, absolutely love having my own space but it's not without problems. No longer splitting rent/bills means I'm paying £500/month more than I was so money is a lot tighter now. Added to the fact work has been very quiet recently and I work from home so find myself sitting around my flat for whole days at a time. I've been single for a couple of years too which has been great, allowed me to be selfish and do whatever I want, but it's getting a bit boring/lonely now.

Normally I run/walk and play football (my only guaranteed social activity each week) to clear my head and have a laugh but I've got a dodgy heel/ankle atm so can't, even walking 10 minutes to the shops is painful.

You may still need to get out a bit. Even if it’s going to a coffee shop to ‘connect’ with life.

Brighton Sky Blue · Sep 20, 2023

Grendel said:
It’s odd as about the only substance I’ve never had an addiction to is food

I can eat loads if I want but can easily manage on 1000 calories of food a day for a fair few days and can sometimes not bother to eat at all during the day

Going into this year I’d say I was addicted to fast food. Certainly used it as a crutch the more stressed I got.

Tommo1993 · Sep 20, 2023

Me and the Mrs hopefully dragging ourselves out of a rut. As a couple we’re just ticketyboo - me, her and the dog.

For a few years we’ve been battling the NHS for help with fertility issues, in the last year though things have intensified. This has completely consumed us and we are closing in on the ultimate possibility of not having our own children. Our minds have been clouded on simple every day things because of it. We feel miles away, out of sorts, distracted. Hopefully it ends with what we want. Couples around us popping out kids, despite being over the moon for them we have to wear a sort of fake, bittersweet smile. I didn’t think envy could be so gut wrenching.

Grendel · Sep 20, 2023

Brighton Sky Blue said:
Going into this year I’d say I was addicted to fast food. Certainly used it as a crutch the more stressed I got.

Never bothered me either way - could eat it for sure but foods just not something that means a thing to me

B-Ban-Boogie · Sep 20, 2023

I've been in a bit of a strange mood the last few months.
The company I work for, moved our 'division' from Florida to Indiana in January and I've been working my ass off implementing my bit to make the move successful.
Travelled, pretty much bi-weekly to the new facility, so spent a lot of time in hotels.
The wife lost her job about 6 months ago and has not really been looking, so the stress has been a bit much.

Now, after 18 years of being in FL, and getting to a place i want to be, the missus' parents are not well (and mine are in their 80's) and now the wife wants to move back to Coventry (or surrounding areas at least) to be around family.

I'm a happy go lucky guy who has made a ton of friends and i'm really trying to put a brave face on for the wife, but its been hard.
I'll have been at my job 30 years this coming May and i haven't even told them about leaving yet as waiting to put the house on the market new week.
Hoping they let me work from home, but my company has changed A LOT since I first moved here and i have no idea what i'm going to do if they tell me to 'do one'.

Really miss my family and friends though so that's the part I'm focusing on...

Ugh..

Edit : Good thread as I needed to vent!

Brighton Sky Blue · Sep 20, 2023

Tommo1993 said:
Me and the Mrs hopefully dragging ourselves out of a rut. As a couple we’re just ticketyboo - me, her and the dog.

For a few years we’ve been battling the NHS for help with fertility issues, in the last year though things have intensified. This has completely consumed us and we are closing in on the ultimate possibility of not having our own children. Our minds have been clouded on simple every day things because of it. We feel miles away, out of sorts, distracted. Hopefully it ends with what we want. Couples around us popping out kids, despite being over the moon for them we have to wear a sort of fake, bittersweet smile. I didn’t think envy could be so gut wrenching.

Would you ever consider adopting? We are not far off being in a similar situation.

clint van damme · Sep 20, 2023

Greggs said:
Thought i'd open a thread where people can express how they're feeling.
I openly admit I used this place as a dumping ground, and had been in a dogshit mood and a dark place for a few weeks. Feeling so much better now after a break from work and away from my phone. Diet has improved, no beers, exercising hard and feeling good about myself.
A few of you reached out (you know who you are) and it helped massively. Thank you
Feel free to vent on this thread, don't hold back and use it as a place to express and talk.
Cheers

Glad you're feeling better Greggs.
Be interested to know how much you think no beer and no phone respectively improved your state of mind.

Tommo1993 · Sep 20, 2023

Brighton Sky Blue said:
Would you ever consider adopting? We are not far off being in a similar situation.

I’m going to try and not sound like a bad person. At the moment with how precious I’m feeling about it, with my barrier up and my fuse short. I feel too selfish. That I want my own. I want the child to be me and her.

It’s not quite over. Maybe in time.

Brighton Sky Blue · Sep 20, 2023

Tommo1993 said:
I’m going to try and not sound like a bad person. At the moment with how precious I’m feeling about it, with my barrier up and my fuse short. I feel too selfish. That I want my own. I want the child to be me and her.

It’s not quite over. Maybe in time.

That isn’t selfish at all mate. We feel the same. Fingers crossed for you both.

TomRad85 · Sep 20, 2023

Tommo1993 said:
Me and the Mrs hopefully dragging ourselves out of a rut. As a couple we’re just ticketyboo - me, her and the dog.

For a few years we’ve been battling the NHS for help with fertility issues, in the last year though things have intensified. This has completely consumed us and we are closing in on the ultimate possibility of not having our own children. Our minds have been clouded on simple every day things because of it. We feel miles away, out of sorts, distracted. Hopefully it ends with what we want. Couples around us popping out kids, despite being over the moon for them we have to wear a sort of fake, bittersweet smile. I didn’t think envy could be so gut wrenching.

The NHS are useless. If you can afford it go to Cyprus (other countries are available) and get it done, its how we had our son. Not been in the best place these last few years as we've had 4 miscarriages and 1 ectopic pregnancy (all natural conceptions) in our quest to give him a sibling. We will soon be attempting IVF for another, we've decided its our last throw as eventually it consumes you and you just need to appreciate what you already have.

Sent from my SM-G973F using Tapatalk

Tommo1993 · Sep 20, 2023

TomRad85 said:
The NHS are useless. If you can afford it go to Cyprus (other countries are available) and get it done, its how we had our son. Not been in the best place these last few years as we've had 4 miscarriages and 1 ectopic pregnancy (all natural conceptions) in our quest to give him a sibling. We will soon be attempting IVF for another, we've decided its our last throw as eventually it consumes you and you just need to appreciate what you already have.

Sent from my SM-G973F using Tapatalk

How did she cope with the ectopic? VERY nasty and dangerous. Sounds like you’ve been even deeper than we have. IVF may be out of reach for us.

TomRad85 · Sep 20, 2023

Tommo1993 said:
How did she cope with the ectopic? VERY nasty and dangerous. Sounds like you’ve been even deeper than we have. IVF may be out of reach for us.

Well the NHS were useless with that too (don't get me started on them tbh) she suspected it herself and none of them were buying it, anyway she ended up in agony in A&E until finally being scanned and all of sudden they realised how fucking dangerous it was and she was having emergency surgery within the hour. That, after all the miscarriages I think broke her a little but she's OK now and we're ready to give it another go.
Is IVF out of reach financially for you or do you mean the chances are slim even if you had it? Fertility is a weird thing, our issues are still 'unknown' which is really unhelpful.

Sent from my SM-G973F using Tapatalk

SkyBlueSoul · Sep 20, 2023

Flying Fokker said:
You may still need to get out a bit. Even if it’s going to a coffee shop to ‘connect’ with life.

Another reason why being able to to go the footie is so important. I do try and nip to the shops if I haven't been out in a few days, just to get out. Luckily I've got a good network of friends so tend to do something at the weekend (although finances are hampering that more now).

Weekdays without running/football exacerbates is where it's worst, especially because the exercise tends to stop me drinking excessively during the week. Put away 2 bottles of wine one night last week just because. Made a conscious effort after that to keep an eye on it.

fernandopartridge · Sep 20, 2023

I was feeling great until I spotted Dean Austin watching my game down at the Connexion tonight

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Ccfcisparks · Sep 20, 2023

SkyBlueSoul said:
I feel like I'm in a bit of a rut atm due to a few factors all feeding into each other which is gradually getting to me more and more. Nothing insurmountable but it all adds up.

Moved into my own place in May which was a great decision, absolutely love having my own space but it's not without problems. No longer splitting rent/bills means I'm paying £500/month more than I was so money is a lot tighter now. Added to the fact work has been very quiet recently and I work from home so find myself sitting around my flat for whole days at a time. I've been single for a couple of years too which has been great, allowed me to be selfish and do whatever I want, but it's getting a bit boring/lonely now.

Normally I run/walk and play football (my only guaranteed social activity each week) to clear my head and have a laugh but I've got a dodgy heel/ankle atm so can't, even walking 10 minutes to the shops is painful.

I injured my ankle really badly, and struggled to do any sport etc. I play football at least 3/4 times a week so it was a massive hit to my life. Like you I live on my own and found myself a bit reclusive. I've found that 1) Going into the office for work when possible has really helped, and 2) like FF said just going out and doing anything is so important.

Its tough as I stopped drinking around a year ago, and a large amount of my friends are bigger drinkers so that makes the social side difficult sometimes.

I started taking myself out to dinner, going to the cinema on my own etc and just trying to enjoy my own company.

How are you feeling? (7 Viewers)

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