the christmas 23 thread (1 Viewer)

[Sky_Blue_Daz]

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Post all christmas jokes clips and songs here

Cheer us all up a bit

 

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[oscillatewildly]

Oh god. Silly sentimental season has arrived again.

 

[skyblueinBaku]

Oh god. Silly sentimental season has arrived again.

That's the spirit!

 

[wingy]

That's the spirit!

Thats some change of name, was it Dorset before?

 

[oscillatewildly]

That's the spirit!

Meh.

 

[oscillatewildly]

Oh god. Silly sentimental season has arrived again.

Sorry, Daz - Not aimed at you personally, just the whole ahh you know.
I'll no doubt add something a little more positive at some point.

 

[shmmeee]

Oh god. Silly sentimental season has arrived again.

 

[Sky_Blue_Daz]

Was in town doing some Christmas shopping today and had a horrible experience

I bumped into my ex and the guy she was seeing behind my back
We were all housemates about 30 years me and the girl had been going out for about 18 months and I was about to propose Anyway one night when we were going out I’d got a call from my house mate Joe who had an accident at work , he got a shard of glass in his eye . The nurses had wrappped his eye in cotton gauze and he was allowed home as long as me or my girlfriend changed the gauze everyday

I done it for a week or so and she said she would do it one evening when I was at football
Anyhow they started seeing each other and have been together ever since

Still it gets me thinking if it hadn’t been for cotton eye Joe I’d of been married a long time ago .

 

[wingy]

Did his eyesight get better?

 

[Sbarcher]

Did his eyesight get better?

No but his Jap eye did.

 

[clint van damme]

Was in town doing some Christmas shopping today and had a horrible experience

I bumped into my ex and the guy she was seeing behind my back
We were all housemates about 30 years me and the girl had been going out for about 18 months and I was about to propose Anyway one night when we were going out I’d got a call from my house mate Joe who had an accident at work , he got a shard of glass in his eye . The nurses had wrappped his eye in cotton gauze and he was allowed home as long as me or my girlfriend changed the gauze everyday

I done it for a week or so and she said she would do it one evening when I was at football
Anyhow they started seeing each other and have been together ever since

Still it gets me thinking if it hadn’t been for cotton eye Joe I’d of been married a long time ago .

I've reported this post

 

[Otis]

I've reported this post

I've reported this post too.

 

[skyblueinBaku]

Thats some change of name, was it Dorset before?

Yes, Wingy. It was Dorset before but we've emigrated to Azerbaijan.

 

[Sky_Blue_Daz]

How much does santa pay for parking his sleigh ?

He doesn’t it’s on the house

 

[Sbarcher]

Why are women's breast like a kids train set at Christmas?
Because they are meant for children but dads like to play with them.

 

[Sky_Blue_Daz]

Last year I got a sweater for Christmas this year I’m hoping for a squirter

 

[oscillatewildly]

I've reported this post too.


View attachment 32612

You need to post that post to your conveyancer, Otis.

 

[Sky_Blue_Daz]

What does Beyoncé have for Christmas dinner

Twerkey

 

[Sky_Blue_Daz]

 

[Sky_Blue_Daz]

Breaking news from santa's toy shop

Production of presents have slowed down due to an outbreak of Tinselitis amongst the elves

 

[wingy]

Breaking news from santa's toy shop

Production of presents have slowed down due to an outbreak of Tinselitis amongst the elves

You just can't get the staff these days!

 

[Sky_Blue_Daz]

You just can't get the staff these days!

elf and safety

 

[Sky_Blue_Daz]

The doors on my Jehovah’s Witness advent calendar won’t open

 

[Sky_Blue_Daz]

 

[skyblue1991]

Mickey Mouse was speaking to his divorce lawyer:

Divorce lawyer - Mickey, you can't say your wife Minnie has big teeth
Mickey Mouse - I never said she has big teeth, I said she was fucking Goofy

Sent from my Pixel 8 using Tapatalk

 

[rob9872]

Where is the @Grendel quiz?

 

[Sky Blue Pete]

What’s Father Christmas wife called???

Mary

 

[Sky_Blue_Daz]

Tampax are replacing the string on their products with tinsel

But it’s just for the Christmas period

 

[Sky_Blue_Daz]

Don’t know if anyone else seen the tractor parade on Saturday night round Redford and keresley , it was brilliant

 

[SkyBlueSoul]

 

[JAM See]

My fifth favourite Christmas song.

 

[Sky_Blue_Daz]

I'm so skint I just opened the door on my advent calendar and there's 2 Bailiffs outside

 

[Sky_Blue_Daz]

Christmas is in doubt as Chris Rea's car has failed its MOT

 

[Sky_Blue_Daz]

Terrible scenes outside me mum and dads earlier a deliveroo lad came off his scooter
I went out running past all the bystanders saying let me through let me through let me get to him . But it was too late I couldn’t do anything a bus drove over me pizza

 

[Earlsdon_Skyblue1]

Oh, go on then...