I agree with a lot of what you say. I haven’t been to many rugby games, a few Coventry matches and an international a couple of years ago in Cardiff between Wales and Ireland. The latter was an “event” type fixture where people went along to have a drink and to post on social media that they had been there. I had my green hat and scarf on and no one batted an eyelid. Welsh and Irish mixed around the stadium. Ironically there was pockets of trouble in the stadium with some people ignoring the very polite stewards and in the end being carted off. Outside the stadium there was some trouble too. However, had that been a football match segregation would definitely have been required to prevent mayhem. I was there to see the game and to see Ireland win. Lots of others would have that same commitment. Lots, however did not seem that bothered. That is a big change from a football crowd where most are passionately committed to one side or another.
I think the point you were trying to make (sorry if this isn’t true) is that the nature of a football crowd will alienate some people and will stop some from coming with their families. I have been hooked on football for over fifty years. I went with my dad (sometimes my mum and sister too). I took my wife (she hates it) and I have taken all of my four sons, two of whom loved it and go with me now, two who just didn’t get it. I have gone and taken my family despite the behaviour of some fellow ‘fans’. Some people who go are the dregs of society. It seem that entering a stadium means that they can behave in an appalling anti social way and because it is the football, that makes it okay. This is much, much worse at away games. At these matches there is often no way of avoiding standing next to anti - social cretins as our games are frequently sold out. I feel really sorry for disabled or elderly people who want to sit at a game. At away matches they have no chance as fellow” fans” will stand in the first row meaning everyone has to stand. Asking them to sit down is asking for a shower of abuse. At Scunthorpe on Saturday there was a group of fifty something blokes who spent the afternoon abusing both sets of players and all of the officials at full volume. They didn’t care who heard, who was there, families, kids, the elderly, it didn’t matter. This was the football and they could do and say what they wanted.
Now some will come on and say, you know what it is like, if you don’t like it, don’t go. I love my team, I love my football. I want us to win as much as anyone, as much as any of the people I have described. My commitment to our club doesn’t make me feel I have to abuse others or behave like a complete cretin. Those who say, “what do you expect, it is football” have to accept that many, many people will not go to football because of the way that some behave. How many people, how many families don’t go because they don’t want to sit through 90 plus minutes of mindless aggression? That is costing our club as it does every other club in the country. I like the ‘edge’ that football has, I like the passion, the desire for your team to win. It doesn’t have to go hand in hand with all of the other stuff.