Doug King Takeover (40 Viewers)

[Greggs]

Hearing rumours that Tubes from SoccerAM is involved in this somehow. It gets stranger and stranger.

 

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[SkyblueDad]

Has he got deep pockets ?

 

[itsabuzzard]

Has he got deep pockets ?

Yes, but very short arms.

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[Greggs]

Has he got deep pockets ?

Yes, but very short arms.

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beat me too it, good to have you back, how was prison?

 

[itsabuzzard]

beat me too it, good to have you back, how was prison?

Thanks. You'll have to wait and buy my book, which should be in all good bookshops for Christmas, at just £45.99. Makes "Papillon" look like a fortnight in CenterParcs.

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[clint van damme]

Thanks. You'll have to wait and buy my book, which should be in all good bookshops for Christmas, at just £45.99. Makes "Papillon" look like a fortnight in CenterParcs.

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I've managed to get hold of a snippet of the first chapter.

'In 2021 I was jailed for shitting in the canal.
I receive a harsh sentence for refusing to name my accomplice.
Yes, I could have had my tariff reduced, but I wouldn't have been able to live with the thought of his owl been left alone to fend for itself'.

 

[itsabuzzard]

I've managed to get hold of a snippet of the first chapter.

'In 2021 I was jailed for shitting in the canal.
I receive a harsh sentence for refusing to name my accomplice.
Yes, I could have had my tariff reduced, but I wouldn't have been able to live with the thought of his owl been left alone to fend for itself'.

If there's one thing I've never needed an accomplice for, it's shitting.

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[Evo1883]

Haven't read trough everything , is shit santa taking us over ?

 

[Sky Blue Harry H]

Haven't read trough everything , is shit santa taking us over ?

It's either shit Santa or shit banter

 

[shmmeee]

Haven't read trough everything , is shit santa taking us over ?

More chance of an SBT takeover than that guy.

 

[edgy]

If there's one thing I've never needed an accomplice for, it's shitting.

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Thinking logically about it though, you would probably need an accomplice if you wanted to shit in a canal. Someone to hold your outstretched arms as you squat over the canal bank. Acting as a counter-balance.

 

[Terry_dactyl]

Thinking logically about it though, you would probably need an accomplice if you wanted to shit in a canal. Someone to hold your outstretched arms as you squat over the canal bank. Acting as a counter-balance.

I reckon you could perch at a lock without the need for assistance.

 

[SkyblueDad]

We just have to be patient and see what happens which is frustrating can’t see this Storey bloke being anything near the real deal and according to Doug King he is the real deal just waiting for the thumbs up from the EFL.
But nothing is ever simple at ccfc.

 

[itsabuzzard]

Thinking logically about it though, you would probably need an accomplice if you wanted to shit in a canal. Someone to hold your outstretched arms as you squat over the canal bank. Acting as a counter-balance.

Can't fault your logic.

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[SkyBlueSam01]

Thinking logically about it though, you would probably need an accomplice if you wanted to shit in a canal. Someone to hold your outstretched arms as you squat over the canal bank. Acting as a counter-balance.

Would the role not be more of a ballast than a counter-balance? The latter suggests the presence of a more dynamic central pivoting point between the accomplice and whoever is shitting over the edge

 

[Samo]

Thinking logically about it though, you would probably need an accomplice if you wanted to shit in a canal. Someone to hold your outstretched arms as you squat over the canal bank. Acting as a counter-balance.

That would require a high level of trust.

 

[itsabuzzard]

That would require a high level of trust.

Too much, I think. Such that I wouldn't be able to relax my sphincter sufficiently. A solo effort, involving ropes and an abseiling technique would do the trick. Job done.

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[AOM]

When is Dale Evans getting involved??

Dale Evans vs William Storey?

 

[edgy]

Would the role not be more of a ballast than a counter-balance? The latter suggests the presence of a more dynamic central pivoting point between the accomplice and whoever is shitting over the edge

Fascinating suggestion. One which I've just pondered. However I'm still thinking counter-balance.



So Mr Red's legs are the pivot point. Mr Blue can move forward or back, enabling Mr Red to directly hit the water rather than soiling the historic brick work.

 

[shmmeee]

That would require a high level of trust.

Never letting @edgy arrange the team building exercises again…

 

[Saddlebrains]

Amazing how quiet it is isn't it.......

 

[chinamans view]

I wonder why, king is not talking anymore ? where is he ?, has buyout fell through ?

 

[Levship20]

This chat is called “Doug King Takeover” can we add “Is not going to happen” to it ?

 

[Samo]

This chat is called “Doug King Takeover” can we add “Is not going to happen” to it ?

And perhaps in brackets... 'How to shit directly into a canal'

 

[itsabuzzard]

I've managed to get hold of a snippet of the first chapter.

'In 2021 I was jailed for shitting in the canal.
I receive a harsh sentence for refusing to name my accomplice.
Yes, I could have had my tariff reduced, but I wouldn't have been able to live with the thought of his owl been left alone to fend for itself'.

I should have asked before, but what's the attraction of shitting in a canal?

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[shmmeee]

I should have asked before, but what's the attraction of shitting in a canal?

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You tell us!

 

[Bugsy]

I should have asked before, but what's the attraction of shitting in a canal?

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Think Greggs might know.....PUSB

 

[SkyblueDad]

I wonder why, king is not talking anymore ? where is he ?, has buyout fell through ?

What is there to say until EFL decision is known.

 

[itsabuzzard]

You tell us!

Despite what Clint van D says, that snippet certainly wasn't penned by me. Autobiographical perhaps?
As an aside, I'd guess there must have been aggravating circumstances to justify a custodial. Serial canal-shitter?

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[SkyBlueSam01]

Fascinating suggestion. One which I've just pondered. However I'm still thinking counter-balance.

View attachment 27563

So Mr Red's legs are the pivot point. Mr Blue can move forward or back, enabling Mr Red to directly hit the water rather than soiling the historic brick work.

Really liking this model - thank you for the diagram which is very informative.

I hadn't previously considered the perched positioning of the feet (Mr Red), which would give excellent flexibility and control for the individual shitting into the canal.

 

[clint van damme]

I should have asked before, but what's the attraction of shitting in a canal?

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It's one of greggs (imaginary) pre match rituals!

 

[Saddlebrains]

Still stand by this being a load of shit

 

[Kieranp96]

Mr king has been silent for 2 weeks now where is he? Why isn’t he coming out publicly ?

 

[Deleted member 5849]

Why isn’t he coming out publicly ?

All in his own good time...

 

[edgy]

The last snippet of info we've had was from the EFL basically saying the ball was in King and SISUs court. I suspect the ball is still there and long since stopped bouncing.