BodicoteSkyBlue
Well-Known Member
Lost a good & old friend today, God bless you Sparks RIP mate.
No. He wasn’t on here.The one from here?
Sorry for your loss.No. He wasn’t on here.
just a friend who had some problems.
Different fella, this one wasn’t really into the football.Not sure if it’s the same guy but seen a few posts today from mates on my social media about another guy who’s died because of his addiction and looks like he was a massive City fan.
Horrible, horrible situation and such a waste.
Hope you’re doing as well as you can be Bodicote.
Yes 100% - unfortunately, I am in the same situation...mates back home have done a lot to try and help him out but he threw it all back in their face. Nothing whatsoever has worked...there seems to be nothing that would give him enough incentive to change...and this is after relapsing several times and then just giving into it all.Was a shock but not a shock if you know what I mean. It was just the sad,inevitable end of what once was a fantastic all round decent fella to know.
Agree 100% - I too have had my own issues in the past...and dare I say, still do, because they don't ever leave.I know firsthand how destructive addiction can be, but I won’t go into that; suffice to say, it nearly cost me my life.
Also, my dad is in a position where addiction has cost him everything but the roof over his head, and is basically being forced to even allow a carer in so he doesn’t fall again and do himself an injury. Considering he’s 200 miles away, it’s a constant concern.
If I’ve learned anything about addiction, it’s that not only is it an escape, but the root is trauma. In its many, many forms.
I’m very lucky that my past experiences haven’t cost me my mind, my family and my life.
It’s always trauma. I’m lucky my addictions weren’t as destructive as alcohol or hard drugs. Mostly I eat shit and smoke weed. Neither great in the long run but unlikely to kill me quickly. The weed has stopped and the food is a constant struggle but manageable and more importantly IMO socially acceptable.
There’s just not enough high quality mental health support at an affordable price out there.
You haven’t derailed it you’ve spoken a lot of useful stuff there100% agree with everything you've said.
Trauma is a massive problem, and it is everywhere. From parenting, shit friendships, toxic relationships - and that is just the baseline. Some people put that on themselves, others project it onto others. It then becomes a never-ending cycle. I'm writing my second book at the moment and cover a lot of this stuff as I find it quite therapeutic to do so.
I've found for me, keeping a really close support network of people is one of the best things you can do. It took me a while to learn that I needed to boot out toxic people as well. They won't be there for you when shit hits the fan. Travel is also good, you meet the most wonderful people and it's pretty eye-opening to see the kindness of strangers sometimes. Life can be so cruel and it is easy to get pushed into the view that so much of the human race are unpleasant when you're stuck in one place. Not trying to hijack the thread, just my two pence worth.
I was thinking about this earlier and unless you’ve got money, access to mental health services is pretty much non-existent/poor quality.You haven’t derailed it you’ve spoken a lot of useful stuff there
My experience is of a friend who’s destructive addiction led to prison and the loss of all their friends, literally!
Just when you need connection is when everyone turns off their compassion, concern and empathy.
The consequences of addiction are terrible to those around the person and means any compassion for the one that’s addicted can be perceived as acceptance of what they’ve done wrong
Shmmee is so right about acceptable addictions and unacceptable
He’s also right about professional mental wellness support.
Or left to well meaning shit friends who have no patience.I was thinking about this earlier and unless you’ve got money, access to mental health services is pretty much non-existent/poor quality.
The difficulty is acceptance of a problem and by then it is usually far too lateOr left to well meaning shit friends who have no patience.
Or third sector
Imagine knowing that if you offer a service to men who are addicted to harmful activity, gambling or porn or drink or violence and that enabling them to get help at an early stage would avoid escalation but didn’t do anything about investing in it. Oh we don’t need to that’s exactly what happens
Yeah, even after all these years my mate still blames everyone else and doesn't accept responsibility for anything.The difficulty is acceptance of a problem and by then it is usually far too late
It is very complex unfortunately. He/she won’t be able to understand why but will know the damage and will not enjoy whatever they are addicted to- self harmYeah, even after all these years my mate still blames everyone else and doesn't accept responsibility for anything.