I’m hoping too....Happy new year to you as well mate. Are you up here for the game tomorrow? Nice little journey over the water for me this one!
Cheers PB....Last few years I’ve gone on NYD depending on what sort of state my head is in. not getting a ticket so will go in the home end if required. Like you say... short trip through the tunnel and I’m up here with family till Thursday I went Wycombe just in case I let myself down later and am crawling around an unfamiliar bedroom at 4am in the morningHappy new year to you as well mate. Are you up here for the game tomorrow? Nice little journey over the water for me this one!
I’m hoping too....
Cheers PB....Last few years I’ve gone on NYD depending on what sort of state my head is in. not getting a ticket so will go in the home end if required. Like you say... short trip through the tunnel and I’m up here with family till Thursday I went Wycombe just in case I let myself down later and am crawling around an unfamiliar bedroom at 4am in the morning
Will be 5 months sober this coming Monday , first xmas time not drinking, I feel fucking miserable.
Xmas eve , xmas day, Boxing Day and now nye all out the way with no booze. Let’s hope it starts getting easier , half of me is wanting to get back to work and back into routine.
Two whole weeks off is a dangerous thing for a recovering Alcoholic especially this time of year.
if I drink one more can of DR Pepper I think I mite explode.
If your able to enjoy and control your drinking, somebody please have a whiskey for me tonight!
Glad you've found something that helps you mate.After Christmas I had a month stretch where I just couldn’t shake off anxiety. I felt like I was underwater most of the time, had dizzy spells and all manner of symptoms. I'm pretty sure depression started to kick in a bit too because I found myself making excuses to go to bed as soon as I possibly could after work and I'd dread getting out of bed in the morning.
I was seriously considering just going to the doctor and asking for pills when I stumbled upon an app called Dare. It guides you through clinically proven ways to manage anxiety and how to stop it in it's tracks. I found myself instantly becoming less tense and the cloud lifting the first night I listened. The audio is spoken by an expert who has a very relaxing and comforting tone. It almost feels like a therapy session. There are also meditations in the programme but I personally find them less helpful than actual expert advice.
I downloaded it a week ago and today I feel almost 100% fine and if I do feel a rush of anxiety I know how to handle it instead of just worrying and making it worse which I'd been doing for about a year or so. A constant loop of worrying about feeling anxious which made me more anxious which manifested itself physically which in turn lead to more worry and so on. Being inside your own head all day is exhausting and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
I highly recommend the app. It tackles depression and worry also. You can sign up for a free 15 day trial which unlocks the entire app which I think is enough time to get the full benefits without spending a penny.
Dare Apps — Dare Response
Curious question to those who suffer from severe anxiety:
Was there a particular point in your life which caused you to suffer more or do you think you have always suffered but certain days its more alarming than others?
Sorry if its too personal a question, I'm just trying to understand more why it happens.
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Thank you for your reply and compresenhive answer.For me - it was always there in the background to some extent but life events forced it out in the open. I had a load of pressure at work that tipped it over the edge & led to a couple of months of constant full on 100% anxiety.
IMHO everyone has a threshold somewhere, that’s set at a certain level by childhood, life experience (good or bad) and personality type. In everyday life, if things are going well for you, you’re well above your threshold & everything’s good. But if you come under pressure from work, ill health, relationship problems, whatever - that can scrape a few layers off your well-being & leave you closer to your threshold. Some people are unlucky & have to spend a lot of their time very near their limit, and it only takes a tiny push to send them over. But for anyone, if you dip down far enough for long enough, you’ll hit your limit at some point & then whatever underlying shit will get stirred up. Need to keep enough in your tank that you’re able to stay above your threshold, wherever it is. If you’re lucky you never find out.
Curious question to those who suffer from severe anxiety:
Was there a particular point in your life which caused you to suffer more or do you think you have always suffered but certain days its more alarming than others?
Sorry if its too personal a question, I'm just trying to understand more why it happens.
Two years ago I would have made fun of people with mental issues but now I know just how horrible they are and that every single one of us is susceptible to them at any time in our lives.
I still think there are a lot of people who mistake having a bad day for mental issues though.
I work with somebody who really plays the mental health card whenever needed.
I’m a little anxious as being made redundant from work and really am not sure which way to turn next
I’m still there. Worked my way up in hmrc over 28 year career. Project managing, writing and delivering learning and development activity. That kind of thingWhat were you working in before?
I’m still there. Worked my way up in hmrc over 28 year career. Project managing, writing and delivering learning and development activity. That kind of thing
Sorry to hear that!I’m a little anxious as being made redundant from work and really am not sure which way to turn next
Given me a bit of time to coordinate stuff on here and take things forward with all partiesSorry to hear that!
So a genuine thanks to those that have shared. Maybe something I need to learn how to do
I still think there are a lot of people who mistake having a bad day for mental issues though.
I work with somebody who really plays the mental health card whenever needed.
I’m a little anxious as being made redundant from work and really am not sure which way to turn next
Speaking from my experience, I tried my hardest to hide my mental health problems from everyone. To this day my wife is the only person who knows what struggles I've had.I still think there are a lot of people who mistake having a bad day for mental issues though.
I work with somebody who really plays the mental health card whenever needed.
I've worked at 3 different companies that have gone tits up and ended up redundant 3 times.. first time I was devastated, I sulked and took ages to find a job as I wasn't really trying. Now its water off a ducks back and I've walked straight into new jobs every time. Get applying for as many (suitable) jobs as possible. I'm telling you now, chances are you'll end up in a job you prefer.I’m a little anxious as being made redundant from work and really am not sure which way to turn next
It was 40
Minutes of walking and thinking before I came up with the perfect response. As it was I just literally ignored him. That happens a lot.
I can relate to this. My wife is the only who I've opened up to and that took time to do.Speaking from my experience, I tried my hardest to hide my mental health problems from everyone. To this day my wife is the only person who knows what struggles I've had.
Like you say there's a difference between having a bad day and having a mental illness, and I'm not sure that many people with genuine mental health problems, want the whole world to know about their issues.
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The french have a phrase for that: 'L'esprit de l'escalier', which translates literally as 'the wit of the staircase'. Happens to us all.
I'm rather older than you but share your self-doubt, self-criticism and introvert nature. I hate parties and places where I have to make small-talk - but oddly enough I can get up on a stage when I have a script and I can talk to anyone or a crowd about things I know well. I won't say I've fully come to terms with it and I still get anxious often; sorry I don't know the answers. But I have learned to smile at people when they talk to me and pretend a little. I also decline party invitations now and avoid situations where I'm going to feel bad. What I'm trying to say is, that there are many of us struggling in the same way - and many of us pretending in public, so you mustn't assume you are alone. It's just one part of the human condition.
I hope you find happiness.
Edit: One other thought. I was in a job in Wales 30 years ago and having a very hard time with the locals. It was suggested that it may be racism to me more than once and if so, it was an 'interesting' situation to be in. I won't go on to virtue signal about how awful racism is...
Anyway, one guy told HR that everyone thought I was a twat (in so many words) and the HR manager told me - she told me to 'buck up'. It devastated me and I couldn't think what I had done to make them all hate me: I'd been quiet and just got on with my job. I was speaking about it to my boss and he said that he thought I was just shy and that the people attacking me were just very negative people. The point is that some people, even extrovert people, have empathy and understanding - so add that to the introverts and it's much more than 50% I reckon who can relate to you.
I get this. I always hated the "schmoozing" that people expected when I was building my businesses (the TV one was the worst).I’m shite at small talk so find it hard to just strike up conversations with new folk. Even in the staff room I’m fine with people I know better but if I don’t see the point of a chat about the weather or whatever then I won’t say much. In front of classes I have to act like the opposite to that.
The flip side is that made me an easy target in the same way you were. Basically it’s being singled out for being a bit different.
I get this. I always hated the "schmoozing" that people expected when I was building my businesses (the TV one was the worst).
I just don't get talking for the sake of talking. Some people used to think I was rude as I drifted off / became distracted during pointless group conversations.
Latest theme atm (being based overseas) is Megxit - rather than Brexit. Don't get offended if I glaze over and show no interest in something as inane as where minor Royals are going to live or how they are going to "earn" a living .
I hate parties and places where I have to make small-talk - but oddly enough I can get up on a stage when I have a script and I can talk to anyone or a crowd about things I know well.
I can do that - I suspect it's partly the same traits as an actor, it becomes a performance, so not you. It's also control if the script is there.
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