Tim Fisher: Fun Facts (1 Viewer)

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mrtrench

mrtrench

Well-Known Member
When he was a child, he fell out with his imaginary friend and had him arrested.

He trains weasels to do circus tricks as a hobby. His favourite weasel is 'Crafty Sam'.

He loves Wensleydale cheese but refuses to eat it in case it makes him look less masculine.

He uses his beard trimmings to stuff cushions. He made two whole pillows when he shaved it off.

He first met Joy Seppala at an inter-bank Dungeons and Dragons competition. He was representing Deutsche bank and Joy BNP Paribas. They played each other in the final. Tim let Joy win.
 
mrtrench

mrtrench

Well-Known Member
His favourite singer is 80s Welsh crooner Bonny Tyler. He owns a rare 12" picture disc of her singing a Gilbert & Sullivan Medley

Tim got through to the final selection stages for the design of Princess Diana's Wedding gown. His design was only rejected at the last minute because Prince Charles thought it was 'too organic'.

Tim sings so loud in the shower that his neighbours made him insulate the walls. Even so, when on top form you can still hear his ablutions from the street. He usually sings Bonny Tyler's 'It's a Heartache'.

Tim was a promising high jumper at school. He can still jump over 6 feet into the air from a standing start.

When Princess Diana died Tim wept for 6 whole days: 3 for Diana and 3 for Dodi Fayed.
 
Esoterica

Esoterica

Well-Known Member
Tim was a champion equestrian throughout his youth winning many 1st place rosettes for three-day eventing on his childhood horse 'Waddle', ironically named after his favourite ever Sheffield Wednesday player. Tim's progress towards becoming a future Olympian was cruelly curtailed when, during a friendly game of polo, he was tragically struck by lightning. Despite surviving unscathed the strike triggered an allergy to horses, confounding the country's top medical experts and putting an end to his equestrian dreams.
 
Terry Gibson's perm

Terry Gibson's perm

Well-Known Member
The real Tim Fisher died in mysterious circumstances two years ago and has been secretly replaced by Orange Ken
 
mrtrench

mrtrench

Well-Known Member
Despite having been picked up on it in every interview, to this day Tim claims on his CV to have "invented Pythagoras's Theorem"

The first thing Tim says to people when he meets them for the first time is to tell them how old he is.
 
D

dadgad

Well-Known Member
Tim's Towers is also called 'alternative reality' - he has a lab where he's created a parallel universe where top is bottom and bottom is top. In it Ccfc are about to win the intergalactic super cup and he is adored by fans who only argue about how big his statue should be.
 
C

CCFC54321

Well-Known Member
When Timmy was a student the first and only thing he won in his life was a nice fancy rosette presented to him for laying the biggest cable in the class measuring in at a whopping 14" in length.

Tim often 'entertains' guests at his home when he pulls out the rosette and fondly recalls how it was won to the delight and whopping of his admiring followers.

Proudly known as 'Timmy the shit' to his close friends.
 
ccfcway

ccfcway

Well-Known Member
in 2008, Tims ill-faited business (privately teaching children maths by using animals) went into administration, following Bernard Matthews threat to take tim to court due to comments about how inferior turkeys were to eagles.

Interestingly, Eddie the Eagle Edwards to this day hasn't commented on Tims teaching methods
 
Esoterica

Esoterica

Well-Known Member
Tim was once airlifted to hospital: In 2016, after a hard days negotiation over an academy move to Warwick University, Tim stopped off for a pint at The Varsity. Unable to resist the lure of a table of 3 cougars in the corner, Tim splashed out on a fish bowl full of strawberry daiquiri in the hope of wooing one of the lucky ladies. Unfortunately, with the warning signs hidden behind his enormous vessel, Tim missed the step and tripped, falling full length and getting his head wedged firmly in the fish bowl. Despite the best attempts of all the other patrons, due to his size, Mr Fisher had to be airlifted to hospital where the flagon was eventually removed. Despite seemingly suffering no immediate complications, dramatic weight loss ensued puzzling multiple doctors until it was finally diagnosed that, at the point of that fateful trip, Tim had accidently swallowed one of the curly straws which remained lodged in his oesophagus. Proud of his new body image, he opted to leave the straw in place and to this day remains on a liquid diet. Tim does, however, also remain single.
 
ccfcway

ccfcway

Well-Known Member
Tims mother, Carrie Fisher asked George Lucas if Tim could make a guest appearance in Star Wars, the Phantom Menace.

When the original actor pencilled in to play Chewbaca was taken ill due to food poisioning, Tim stood in and played the wookie for 2 days. Tim struck up a friendship with Jabba the Hut, who can to this day be seen visiting Tim and his family at their holiday home caravan in Camber Sands
 
Liquid Gold

Liquid Gold

Well-Known Member
He secretly responds to all the spam emails about penis enlargement. One of the scams was a success and he now has an 11ft dong. This means he's unable to copulate with anything but a blue whale hence his sad eyes.
 
JonSilletBang

JonSilletBang

Well-Known Member
A young Tim could often be seen burning ants with a magnifying glass, pulling the legs off Daddy Longlegs, and generally torturing insects. He gained the nickname Timmy the Torturer.

The snot nosed little urchin was growing up fast, his lust for inflicting pain and misery on defenceless creatures was not enough. He needed more. He needed to see despair and tortured confusion on the faces of human victims. Chinese burns, wet willies, wedgies, and hot taps were now his weapons of choice. At school he was the 'Daddy', but the creepiest of teachers pets at the same time...

Throughout his school years he bullied the weak and charmed the powerful. This behaviour continued throughout his further education, the potting shed became his torture den, the weaker students lured at recess and subjected to vile depravity and ritual humiliation.

Now a graduate, Tim knew that the torture of individuals was not enough to satisfy his ever growing need for inflicting misery. He needed more. He needed like minded individuals, groups of people with a common interest, to build up there hopes and dreams, then violently crush them. To laugh in their faces, to rub fist fulls of rock salt into the open wounds.

He drove north, rain lashing his Skoda Superb. He saw a red glow in the distance, voices singing loud and proud in the night sky. Young and old with clear passion. Tim's lip quivered. His beige coat flapped in the breeze. He had found his victim.
 
C

CCFC54321

Well-Known Member
Tim is in negotiations with NASA on the sale of Lunar bricks for the forthcoming mission to Mars.

Perhaps Tim could donate a few for the new stadium?
 
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