What’s it all about? (5 Viewers)

shmmeee

Well-Known Member
I apologise - I've no urge to get into a huge, personalised row on it, though I think our kid knew that it wasn't really going to go down well! (Fnaar-fnarr etc..)

Anyhow, from my limited experience of working alongside someone who transitioned from male to female, I've seen how much happier and more comfortable they are as a woman. It has had zero personal impact on me, other than having to remember a different name.

I'm sure I still don't get it all right, the world's moving quickly, and some of things that I used to think were funny (favourite insult, "bender!") aren't any more, and rightly so.

I get why; people shouldn't be scared of being who they want to be, or insulted or demeaned (or worse, attacked) for it. I can't always get it right, but I can try to understand rather than sneering or pretending it doesn't exist.

And that’s fine. But it’s not just about you and him, it’s about the women he’s asking to share spaces and competition with.

Dress how you want, call yourself what you want, have whatever body modification you want, but no one has the right to identify into a vulnerable group and bypass the mechanisms society has put in place for fairness and safety.
 

shmmeee

Well-Known Member
He is also the most vocal about trans people being mentally defective.

Now you’re moving the goalposts. Just because a dictator knows sex exists doesn’t mean we have to pretend it doesn’t. Iran offers sex change for free because they don’t like gay people. Where does that leave you?
 

Brighton Sky Blue

Well-Known Member
Now you’re moving the goalposts. Just because a dictator knows sex exists doesn’t mean we have to pretend it doesn’t. Iran offers sex change for free because they don’t like gay people. Where does that leave you?
I have no idea what you’re on about. Something’s been up with you lately I reckon
 

shmmeee

Well-Known Member
I have no idea what you’re on about. Something’s been up with you lately I reckon

Thanks for your diagnosis. You said people who believe sex is real should be ashamed cos Putin does too. Well you think humans can change sex and so does the Iranian government, so by your own logic you should be ashamed. Or realise it’s a ridiculous argument to make. There are good and shit people on both sides of the debate. The right push it because it makes the left look Fucking mental and 99% of people agree.
 

clint van damme

Well-Known Member
I have no idea what you’re on about. Something’s been up with you lately I reckon

It's not a black and white issue and I think Shmmeees point is that you'll always find some group of wrong uns who agree with an opinion you don't if you want to try and disparage that opinion.
 

Brighton Sky Blue

Well-Known Member
It's not a black and white issue and I think Shmmeees point is that you'll always find some group of wrong uns who agree with an opinion you don't if you want to try and disparage that opinion.
It is a little different when referring to a country where trans people are treated as mentally ill.
 

clint van damme

Well-Known Member
Now you’re moving the goalposts. Just because a dictator knows sex exists doesn’t mean we have to pretend it doesn’t. Iran offers sex change for free because they don’t like gay people. Where does that leave you?

Some right wing Christian parents of gay kids in the States pushing it to because being trans is better than being gay in their opinion.
 

Grendel

Well-Known Member

Brighton Sky Blue

Well-Known Member
I thought that.

Up until last year when Mrs WM told me you can put stuff like Caramel or Brown Sugar syrup in a coffee. Who knew?! Not me.

Game-changer. Hate normal coffee but can do a Latte with Brown Sugar Syrup, no problem. Get me.
Probably not the smartest idea for a fatso like myself but worth keeping in mind!
 

Sbarcher

Well-Known Member
"Safe spaces" for cis women (aka "women") are absolutely critical, and having a trans woman as a brownie leader is just wrong.
Where do we stand on trans women in sport? I'm anti, and glad that many of the governing bodies appear to be "growing a pair" and standing up to the pressure for inclusivity.
I know it’s the Mail, but still a bit unpleasant.
 

duffer

Well-Known Member
And that’s fine. But it’s not just about you and him, it’s about the women he’s asking to share spaces and competition with.

Dress how you want, call yourself what you want, have whatever body modification you want, but no one has the right to identify into a vulnerable group and bypass the mechanisms society has put in place for fairness and safety.

I'm sorry, are you on the "trans people are predators/rapists" line here? And then using that to argue against people transitioning?

That is an odd take, imho, and seriously offensive to a minority who are themselves particularly vulnerable.
 

shmmeee

Well-Known Member
I'm sorry, are you on the "trans people are predators/rapists" line here? And then using that to argue against people transitioning?

That is an odd take, imho, and seriously offensive to a minority who are themselves particularly vulnerable.

Im on the “trans women are men and therefore no more or less likely than any other man to be a predator” line.

Im not sure why this blatantly obvious take is deemed seriously offensive TBH. I couldn’t care less how you want to dress, what you want to call yourself, who you want to sleep with (consensually) or when you’re an adult what plastic surgery you want to have.
 

rob9872

Well-Known Member
Finding this whole thread quite odd. Most seem to have chosen a 'side' when it's clear there is a huge grey area.

Fwiw I'm very much in the live and let live, although would I be comfortable if someone identifying as a woman getting changed in the open next to my 15 year old daughter? Absolutely not.

Probably says more about my personal prejudices than anything else, but I'm not sure its one you can easily answer without knowing how that person perceives themselves. Tbh it's probably in the same vane as us white folk banging on about race issues when in reality we don't have a clue how someone else feels without walking a mile in their shoes.
 

OffenhamSkyBlue

Well-Known Member
Im on the “trans women are men and therefore no more or less likely than any other man to be a predator” line.

Im not sure why this blatantly obvious take is deemed seriously offensive TBH. I couldn’t care less how you want to dress, what you want to call yourself, who you want to sleep with (consensually) or when you’re an adult what plastic surgery you want to have.
I absolutely agree with you Shmmeee (and i didn't see you make any argument against transitioning), but the reason why Sharron Davies, J K Rowling and others have got themselves into conflict with the trans community is because they said out loud that there should be safe spaces where biological men are not allowed. Female changing rooms at gyms and pools are a case in point, but that does offend trans women. There HAVE been cases where men have "identified" as a trans woman solely to gain access to females with the intention of harassing or assaulting them. Those people WILL be in the minority, but if women do not feel safe with a genetic bloke in their safe space, they should not be allowed in.
 

clint van damme

Well-Known Member
I absolutely agree with you Shmmeee (and i didn't see you make any argument against transitioning), but the reason why Sharron Davies, J K Rowling and others have got themselves into conflict with the trans community is because they said out loud that there should be safe spaces where biological men are not allowed. Female changing rooms at gyms and pools are a case in point, but that does offend trans women. There HAVE been cases where men have "identified" as a trans woman solely to gain access to females with the intention of harassing or assaulting them. Those people WILL be in the minority, but if women do not feel safe with a genetic bloke in their safe space, they should not be allowed in.

I agree, the problem isn't genuine trans people, it's an all too familiar type of man.
As Rob said, lots of grey areas and lots of divided opinion in the LGBT community itself.
 

shmmeee

Well-Known Member
I absolutely agree with you Shmmeee (and i didn't see you make any argument against transitioning), but the reason why Sharron Davies, J K Rowling and others have got themselves into conflict with the trans community is because they said out loud that there should be safe spaces where biological men are not allowed. Female changing rooms at gyms and pools are a case in point, but that does offend trans women. There HAVE been cases where men have "identified" as a trans woman solely to gain access to females with the intention of harassing or assaulting them. Those people WILL be in the minority, but if women do not feel safe with a genetic bloke in their safe space, they should not be allowed in.

Leaving aside all the evidence that trans women commit sex crimes at the same or higher rate than other men. You can’t start salami slicing men. I’m sure very few men called shmmeee commit crimes and there’s not many so let them in, effeminate men, gay men, the list goes on. The point is no woman knows which strange man is safe until he’s not.
 

wingy

Well-Known Member
Leaving aside all the evidence that trans women commit sex crimes at the same or higher rate than other men. You can’t start salami slicing men. I’m sure very few men called shmmeee commit crimes and there’s not many so let them in, effeminate men, gay men, the list goes on. The point is no woman knows which strange man is safe until he’s not.
I’ve always found coffee suppresses hunger a bit. Oat milk (no added sugar) if people don’t like black is a good shout
Possibly reduce your cholesterol too?
 

Ian1779

Well-Known Member
Finding this whole thread quite odd. Most seem to have chosen a 'side' when it's clear there is a huge grey area.

Fwiw I'm very much in the live and let live, although would I be comfortable if someone identifying as a woman getting changed in the open next to my 15 year old daughter? Absolutely not.

Probably says more about my personal prejudices than anything else, but I'm not sure its one you can easily answer without knowing how that person perceives themselves. Tbh it's probably in the same vane as us white folk banging on about race issues when in reality we don't have a clue how someone else feels without walking a mile in their shoes.
This is a perfectly reasonable thought process especially given you are being protective of your daughter.

I wouldn’t think asking a trans person to use a singular changing space would be an unreasonable request, in the interests of keeping everybody safe.
 

duffer

Well-Known Member
Im on the “trans women are men and therefore no more or less likely than any other man to be a predator” line.

Im not sure why this blatantly obvious take is deemed seriously offensive TBH. I couldn’t care less how you want to dress, what you want to call yourself, who you want to sleep with (consensually) or when you’re an adult what plastic surgery you want to have.

While all men are potential rapists, I suspect you'd be offended if you were treated like one or referred to as one, no?

I'm no expert, but I think the vast majority of people who have or whom are transitioning from men to women, do not consider themselves to be men.

Most of them, I believe, feel that they are women born into a man's body.

Having chosen to change, I think they would find it offensive to be treated as men just because some people can't quite get their heads around the concept.

If you're talking about shared spaces like changing rooms and toilets, then I suspect that everyone involved would expect a degree of privacy and safety where things like this come into question. That's a subtly different issue, similarly with how women's sport needs to deal with this.

But your 'blatantly obvious' statement that trans men are still men, is by definition not 'blatantly obvious'. It's a dismissive device for shutting down the debate akin to 'end of' or 'fact'.

Fact. 😁
 

duffer

Well-Known Member
Finding this whole thread quite odd. Most seem to have chosen a 'side' when it's clear there is a huge grey area.

Fwiw I'm very much in the live and let live, although would I be comfortable if someone identifying as a woman getting changed in the open next to my 15 year old daughter? Absolutely not.

Probably says more about my personal prejudices than anything else, but I'm not sure its one you can easily answer without knowing how that person perceives themselves. Tbh it's probably in the same vane as us white folk banging on about race issues when in reality we don't have a clue how someone else feels without walking a mile in their shoes.

There's no way I'm walking a mile in high heels, but other than that I absolutely take your point. Which is concerning. I'm off to pray to at my altar of Corbyn (blessed be his name) in the hope that he can guide me back onto the one true path. 😁
 

SBT

Well-Known Member
I know it’s the Mail, but still a bit unpleasant.
Find this story quite sad really - did the parents raise the alarm because she was acting suspiciously, or threatening someone? Or just because they find trans people scary? I’m not saying anyone’s necessarily acting in bad faith here, but there has to be a more civil solution than ‘Absolutely no trans people in female bathrooms ever’ or ‘Accommodate my needs or face my wrath online’*

* I should add that the idea that the Mail would turn someone’s complaint about which bathrooms to use at a local gym into a news story is pretty ridiculous, and emblematic of the way trans people are hounded just for going about their lives
 

Grendel

Well-Known Member
Excellent debate on this topic last night on GB News with Peter tatchell (as ever) taking the Trans side but struggling to debate a trans arguing against pre op trans people entering female areas
 

shmmeee

Well-Known Member
While all men are potential rapists, I suspect you'd be offended if you were treated like one or referred to as one, no?

I'm no expert, but I think the vast majority of people who have or whom are transitioning from men to women, do not consider themselves to be men.

Most of them, I believe, feel that they are women born into a man's body.

Having chosen to change, I think they would find it offensive to be treated as men just because some people can't quite get their heads around the concept.

If you're talking about shared spaces like changing rooms and toilets, then I suspect that everyone involved would expect a degree of privacy and safety where things like this come into question. That's a subtly different issue, similarly with how women's sport needs to deal with this.

But your 'blatantly obvious' statement that trans men are still men, is by definition not 'blatantly obvious'. It's a dismissive device for shutting down the debate akin to 'end of' or 'fact'.

Fact. 😁

No. I completely understand why I’m not allowed in women’s spaces and I’m fine with that, because I’m not a creeper.

If you want to argue humans can change literally sex then crack on. Don’t be surprised if people don’t take you seriously though. There’s no need to make shit up to be nice to trans people. Discrimination is illegal like any other protected characteristic.
 

OffenhamSkyBlue

Well-Known Member
Leaving aside all the evidence that trans women commit sex crimes at the same or higher rate than other men. You can’t start salami slicing men. I’m sure very few men called shmmeee commit crimes and there’s not many so let them in, effeminate men, gay men, the list goes on. The point is no woman knows which strange man is safe until he’s not.
... or, sadly, far too often even when he is no longer a stranger to her.
 

duffer

Well-Known Member
No. I completely understand why I’m not allowed in women’s spaces and I’m fine with that, because I’m not a creeper.

If you want to argue humans can change literally sex then crack on. Don’t be surprised if people don’t take you seriously though. There’s no need to make shit up to be nice to trans people. Discrimination is illegal like any other protected characteristic.

It's not making shit up, and it's fuck all to do with being nice. It's about treating people who are different with some respect, figuring out the best way to do that, and not being so absolutely convinced you know it all. It seems you're getting yourself all wound up because you can't bear to think people might think differently on this. This "men are men, end of" stuff is prehistoric, imho.

I've no idea what your problem is tbh, "crack on" yourself though if you can't be arsed to actually consider it.

I will say this; you can quit the bullshit about protecting the vulnerable if you're too closed-minded to see there's more than one side to that.
 

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