Bad joke corner (4 Viewers)

Coventry La La La

New Member
Failed my Politics exam. The question was "Describe the role that India plays in the modern world".

Apparently "Tech Support" is not the correct answer.

:eek:
 

skybluedan

Well-Known Member
a man says to his wife,right you me and the dog are going fishing.....
the wife replies i dont fuckin wanna go fishing,right he says you have 3 choices
you can come fishing
or give me a blow job
or you can take one up the shitter
the wife picks the blow job after a while she says im not being funny love but your dick tastes like shit.......
he says i know the dog didnt want to go fishing either........................
 

Coventry La La La

New Member
I'm on a mission to wipe out all stores from a German multi-national supermarket chain. It will take a long time but I'll do it -
Lidl by Lidl.​
 

Coventry La La La

New Member
I remember how stupid I felt the day I found out Santa Claus doesn't exist. I realised how ridiculous the whole concept was and was clearly just a method of blackmailing children to behave themselves all year round.

Anyway, I'm off to church now. I don't want to piss God off or I will go to hell.
 

dilligaf

New Member
My daughter was asked to do a farmyard impression at school today,apparently
"Get the fuck off my land before i shoot you, you pikey bastard."
wasn't quite what the teacher was expecting. ;)
 

dilligaf

New Member
My son just came in and said
"i have lost my virginity to the neighbours daughter last night"
i said "fair enough son i hope you wore something"
he said "don't worry i wore my balaclava":eek:



seen on page 17 after posting "DOH"
 
Last edited:

cheesehog

New Member
what has a slice of burnt toast and a pregnant girlfriend got in common? In both cases you wish you'd taken it out a few seconds earlier.:eek:
 

skybluedan

Well-Known Member
i said to the mrs lets play chilean minors....
she said you want me to go down on your shaft till i reach the bottom........
i said no you can fuck off out my sight for 4 months
 

skybluedan

Well-Known Member
shagged a girl with a stutter last night..
i was lucky
just managed to finish before she said no.......
 

skybluedan

Well-Known Member
my uncle was a rubbish ventriloquist........
he used to put his fingers up me arse and ask me not to say anything...............
 

skybluedan

Well-Known Member
more bad news fo jordan last night ....
peter andre rang to talk about the kids
and harvey answered the iron.......................
 

Coventry La La La

New Member
ITV Weather: If conditions stay the same it is possible we could have a white Christmas.


Possible? I'd say it was definite if they stay the same as it's currently fucking snowing.
 

Disorganised1

New Member
If you get an e-mail today with an attachment saying "Look at my tinned meat." Don't open it ! - It's SPAM.
 

redsox

Facebook User
Life was hard when I was a kid. We lived on a rough estate. The other kids used to pick on me and cover me whipped cream and put a cherry on my head......It was hard growing up in the gateaux.


:laugh::laugh:
 

smileycov

Facebook User
just had 2 blokes in suits on my doorstep for an hour, talking about the benefits of brown bread...............fucking Hovis Witnesses!! :D
 

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