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I thought it was tripe too.

Are you on the wacky tabacky m8?

The Bogfather.

The Italian president said he'll make sure anyone profiteering from the virus will be hunted down and made to pay. I wonder if Liam Neeson has received the call yet.

This isn't how I'm used to seeing a ginger pussy on a laptop.

It shouldn't cost too much as it's a spaghetti western.

My girlfriend bought a packet of paracetamol for £3 in some chemist today. It would have cost 30p in any supermarket. Wankers.

Jim'll Fix It.

I've heard of that. It has that Italian actor Al Dente in it.

Take Shelter A normal everyday family man starts having premonitions and visions of a major natural disaster. He builds a massive shelter, stockpiles food goes mental etc. It's really good.

I actually applied to be a chaser. I wanted be nicknamed The Predator and If I beat someone I could literally chase them out of the studio. No reply as of yet.

The thing is, accepting the low offer isn't even a bad plan because it more or less guarantees that the contestant will get through to the final chase which is where it matters.

There are some proper nasty bastards that take these quiz shows way too seriously. A friend of mine went on Tipping Point last year and won £10k. I checked Twitter to see reactions to his appearance and they were mostly vicious remarks because he answered a few questions wrong and wore a red shirt.

Woah there. Calm down horsey. That's very graphic language.

Why do people like Pot Noodles? It's like eating elastic bands from a container of seasoned piss water.

I don't think you're being soppy at all. If anything you've taken quite an adult and reasoned approach to something some people might have gone properly mental over. I have a friend that agreed to split up for a while with his girlfriend. She turned around after a week and said she wanted to...

Things like this always make me realise how we're not that far removed from cattle. The only difference being that herd animals don't deliberately get themselves in these kind of situations.

I would find it impossible to have the no contact agreement in place. My mind would be working overtime everyday and that limbo and confusion would ultimately lead me to feeling down and god knows what. The no contact thing might work for her but it's not working for you and that's something...

A cold chicken and mushroom pie with a cheeky dollop of ketchup on the side. A truly classic dish.